Journal Responding to Myself (#5)

Dear Master Andrew,
It is good to hear that all is well. I must congratulate you on your strong effort on your quiz. However, you must make an effort to study when you know you will be having tests or quizzes. I was talking to the notebooks on the same shelf I was perched on. They felt neglected when you hadn't opened them to study or add any information too. Yet, at the same time, they feel as if they are in good hands. As you report, your grades are on the rise, which is a good thing. Kudos to you for that goal too. If I only had legs, I would understand more of what all this "goal" business is all about. If only some text relating to this subject of "soccer" sat on my meager shelf...
As for me, I am faring quite well myself. I sat on my shelf and talked it up with Night, NASCAR for Dummies, and that old comic book, Garfield Eats Crow. I cannot believe how heartless your kind are. Night told me all about some "war" your people had back in the day. In it, weren't people killed because of their government? Thankfully, I cannot really "die," hence being non-living. It actually sounded quite horrible if you asked me. My good "friend" NASCAR for Dummies made me feel like a fool the other day. How was I supposed to know what a checkered flag or catch can was? Pure outrage, if you asked me. My other buddy Garfield Eats Crow made me laugh, on the other hand. I can't believe what a dweeb that human Jon is, golfing in a hail storm wearing a cooking pot on his head as a helmet. That fat cat Garfield is a real softy too. He's a cat. He is naturally inclined to catch mice, well, that's what the New Book of Knowledge told me back in my infancy in the book store. Yet, Garfield does nothing about those little pests. If I were Jon, I'd kick that lazy "pest" out of my house.
Speaking of pests... Come quick! A bookworm is heading my way! I have no legs to run, no means for self-defense! What unspeakable pain I shall suffer! I once heard that in a New York public library, a single bookworm ate a path through thirteen volumes of an encyclopedia... Come quick, my master, I shall not suffer at this creature's expense! I will do anything!
Your mentor,
The Diary