How are you this fine day? I hope you're suffering much at my expense. I hope you are seeing the humans turn away from your foolish ways. Goodness... Who would live for something boring like that? I wouldn't. Your little creations, the humans, are realizing the trivialness of such goodness. Soon, they will be mine! How do i plan to do this? It's quite simple actually.
First of all, I'll show them how to sin. As we all know, sin is a refusal to do your will. Most of those humans have already discovered sin on their own. Now, I plan to subtly act on each human through agents, who will slowly but surely increase the humans' aptitude towards sin. What's next? Well, you're humans will be sinning and saying all variations of abominations to your face. Only then may you see the "goodness" of evil prevail. The humans are always inclined towards it, and they will find its message more attractive than that of your "goodness" of abstinence and having a pure self. Why am I telling you my very plan for universal domination? That is simply because I see it as infallible, and that even if you were to find a way around it, I and my agents are always devising back-up plans. That means that perhaps this plan described here might not even be used...
That is all for now. This is war, and one I shall win. If you think otherwise, you are wrong. Your fickle beings, the humans, have much potential to turn against you, and accept my ways, and you must realize that when they hear me, all is lost for you. That said, have a fantastically average day.
Yours not truly,
The Devil
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